Women Are Catty

Women are Catty

That’s right. I said it, and I’ll say it again. Women are catty.

Not all women. But in general. I’ve touched on this before, but I think it’s a subject we can talk about time and time again. I have a theory (yes, another one) that this stems from insecurity, ignorance, and judgment.

Before I get into all of the negativity of this subject, let me preface this with the fact that I’ve been around some groups of women who actually uplift each other, root for each other, support each other, and encourage each other to shine. Maybe it’s a maturity thing. Maybe it’s just a personal thing.

The women I’ve been around who don’t seem to tear each other down have gone through their own struggles and found the light within themselves. Self-work is hard and messy. We all have some sort of trauma or demons to overcome. It’s a never-ending process in this lifetime. I actually find inspiration and comfort in sharing struggles and overcoming them with each other.

They say you really get to know someone when you travel with them. I’ve been blessed enough to travel with a few different groups of women over the years, especially this year. It’s been so refreshing to be a part of a group where catiness and pettiness were not present, at least not that I was aware of.

I have two close friends that I’ve been on a couple of trips with. It’s fairly easy to manage that kind of thing with only three women who all know each other well and get along. It’s different to travel with a large group of women (on occasion most of whom I barely know), and still experience a drama-free trip.

However, I have been fortunate enough to go on a few trips so far with a fair amount of women and no drama. The first time I experienced that was a few years back when about 6 of us went to San Diego. The following year a few of us from the same group went to Seattle. And, I’ve already been on two such trips just this year.

The first big girls trip this year was in May when eight of us went to Nashville. One hotel room, one bathroom, and eight women. There were no fights over the restroom, space, doing hair or makeup, or anything of the sort.

There were two sinks with mirrors in different parts of the room, which probably helped. The room was HUGE, with two beds, a pull-out sofa bed, and a huge dining table. That amount of space probably helped as well. But either way I think we would have figured it out. We all kind of claimed a small area in the room for our stuff and just worked around each other.

Everyone stated what was important for them to get out of the trip and we made it all work. I think we got to experience a lot, though not everything, due to time restraints. It was fun, exciting, relaxing, and had a ton of positive vibes and memories. This group has never traveled together before. I have traveled with two of the women who went (separately), but most of the women present had only traveled with one or two of the other women.

The dynamic was powerful to me because of the lack of jealousy, drama, or negativity. We took care of each other, whether one of us had a bit too much to drink or had some kind of illness. (I was down for a whole day with a horrible migraine that ended up lasting over a week.)

The second trip I’ve gotten to enjoy so far this year included six of us who went to Atlanta together for a motorcycle event. We had an airbnb with plenty of space, three bedrooms, and two and a half bathrooms, but it was the same outcome. We all had our own little areas and had no issues sharing the space to shower and get ready – for several different events.

I recently got to spend a few hours with a dear friend from high school as well. We caught up, like we always do. And as usual it seemed like no time had passed at all, even though we’ve only hung out a handful of times in the past 23 years.

I guess I’m reflecting on this because I’m also seeing a pattern. When I don’t involve myself in drama and pettiness, and I truly accept and respect myself, I am able to also fully accept, respect, and appreciate other women. Instead of judging others harshly, I find myself looking for things to appreciate in other women.

Let’s face it, we all have hardships and tough things to overcome in our daily lives. Why should we make each other’s existence that much harder? I’m not perfect, and not even remotely trying to pretend to be. I’m simply reflecting on changes and growth in myself and how that translates to the world around me.

I read something in a book that said something along the lines of, your light shining bright can’t dim mine, and mine can’t dim yours. We all offer different strengths and gifts. I’d much rather enjoy those and encourage you to shine as bright as possible so that we can make this world a brighter place together.